友情提示:如果本网页打开太慢或显示不完整,请尝试鼠标右键“刷新”本网页!
读书室 返回本书目录 加入书签 我的书架 我的书签 TXT全本下载 『收藏到我的浏览器』

adam bede(亚当[1].比德)-第145部分

快捷操作: 按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页 按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页 按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部! 如果本书没有阅读完,想下次继续接着阅读,可使用上方 "收藏到我的浏览器" 功能 和 "加入书签" 功能!

                                     Adam Bede                                         591 



trying   to   hide   the   truth。   God’s   love   and   mercy   can   overcome   all 

things—our   ignorance;   and   weakness;   and   all   the   burden   of   our 

past wickedness—all things but our wilful sin; sin that we cling to; 

and   will   not   give   up。   You   believe   in   my   love   and   pity   for   you; 

Hetty;   but   if   you   had   not   let   me   come   near   you;   if   you   wouldn’t 

have looked at me or spoken to me; you’d have shut me out from 

helping you。 I couldn’t have made you feel my love; I couldn’t have 

told you what I felt for you。 Don’t shut God’s love out in that way; 

by   clinging   to   sin   。  。  。  He   can’t   bless  you   while     you   have    one 

falsehood in your soul; his pardoning mercy can’t reach you until 

you    open     your   heart    to  him;    and    say;  ‘I  have    done    this   great 

wickedness; O God; save me; make me pure from sin。’ While you 

cling to one sin and will not part with it; it must drag you down to 

misery   after   death;   as   it   has   dragged   you   to   misery   here   in   this 

world;     my    poor;    poor    Hetty。    It  is  sin   that   brings    dread;     and 

darkness; and despair: there is light and blessedness for us as soon 

as   we   cast  it  off。   God  enters   our   souls   then;   and   teaches   us;   and 

brings us strength and peace。 Cast it off now; Hetty—now: confess 

the   wickedness   you   have   done—the   sin   you   have   been   guilty   of 

against your Heavenly Father。 Let us kneel down together; for we 

are in the presence of God。” 

    Hetty obeyed Dinah’s movement; and sank on her knees。 They 

still   held   each   other’s   hands;   and   there   was   long   silence。   Then 

Dinah said; “Hetty; we are before God。 He is waiting for you to tell 

the truth。” 

    Still   there    was     silence。    At   last  Hetty     spoke;    in   a  tone    of 

beseeching— 

    “Dinah  。   。   。   help me   。   。   。   I   can’t   feel   anything   like   you   。   。   。   my 

heart is hard。” 



George Eliot                                                             ElecBook Classics 


… Page 592…

                                     Adam Bede                                       592 



    Dinah held the clinging hand; and all her soul went forth in her 

voice: 



    “Jesus;   thou  present  Saviour!  Thou   hast   known   the  depths   of 

all   sorrow:   thou   hast   entered   that   black   darkness   where   God   is 

not;   and   hast   uttered   the   cry   of   the   forsaken。   Come   Lord;   and 

gather  of  the   fruits   of   thy   travail   and   thy   pleading。   Stretch   forth 

thy hand; thou who art mighty to save to the uttermost; and rescue 

this lost one。 She is clothed round with thick darkness。 The fetters 

of her sin are upon her; and she cannot stir to come to thee。 She 

can only feel her heart is hard; and she is helpless。 She cries to me; 

thy  weak   creature   。   。   。   Saviour!  It  is   a  blind   cry   to   thee。   Hear   it! 

Pierce   the   darkness!   Look   upon         her   with   thy   face   of   love   and 

sorrow that thou didst turn on him who denied thee; and melt her 

hard heart。 

    “See;   Lord;   I   bring   her;   as   they   of   old   brought   the   sick   and 

helpless;   and   thou   didst   heal   them。   I   bear   her   on   my   arms   and 

carry her before thee。 Fear and trembling have taken hold on her; 

but she trembles only at the pain and death of the body。 Breathe 

upon her thy life…giving Spirit; and put a new fear within her—the 

fear of her sin。 Make her dread to keep the accursed thing within 

her    soul。   Make     her   feel   the   presence     of  the   living   God;    who 

beholds all the past; to whom the darkness is as noonday; who is 

waiting   now;   at   the   eleventh   hour;   for   her   to   turn   to   him;   and 

confess her sin; and cry for mercy—now; before the night of death 

comes; and the moment of pardon is   for  ever  fled; like   yesterday 

that returneth not。 

    “Saviour!   It   is   yet   time—time       to   snatch   this   poor   soul   from 

everlasting darkness。 I believe—I believe in thy infinite love。 What 



George Eliot                                                           ElecBook Classics 


… Page 593…

                                     Adam Bede                                       593 



is my love or my pleading? It is quenched in thine。 I can only clasp 

her in my weak arms and urge her with my weak pity。 Thou—thou 

wilt    breathe     on    the   dead    soul;   and    it  shall    arise   from     the 

unanswering sleep of death。 

    “Yea;   Lord;   I   see   thee;   coming   through   the   darkness   coming; 

like   the   morning;   with   healing   on   thy   wings。   The   marks   of   thy 

agony   are   upon   thee—I   see;   I   see   thou   art   able   and      willing   to 

save—thou         wilt   not   let   her   perish    for   ever。    “Come;      mighty 

Saviour! Let the dead hear thy voice。 Let the eyes of the blind be 

opened。 Let her see that God encompasses her。 Let her tremble at 

nothing   but  at   the   sin   that   cuts   her   off   from   him。   Melt   the   hard 

heart。   Unseal   the   closed   lips:   make   her   cry   with   her   whole   soul; 

‘Father; I have sinned’ 。 。 。 ” 



    “Dinah;”   Hetty   sobbed   out;   throwing   her   arms   round   Dinah’s 

neck; “I will speak 。 。 。 I will tell 。 。 。 I won’t hide it any more。” 

    But the tears and sobs were too violent。 Dinah raised her gently 

from her knees and seated her on the pallet again; sitting down by 

her side。 It was a long time before the convulsed throat was quiet; 

and     even    then    they   sat  some     time    in  stillness   and    darkness; 

holding each other’s hands。 At last Hetty whispered; “I   did do  it; 

Dinah 。 。 。 I buried it in the wood 。 。 。 the little baby 。 。 。 and it cried 。 

。 。 I heard it cry 。 。 。 ever such a way off 。 。 。 all night 。 。 。 and I went 

back because it cried。” 

    She   paused;   and   then   spoke   hurriedly   in   a   louder;         pleading 

tone。 

    “But I thought perhaps it wouldn’t die—there might somebody 

find it。 I didn’t kill it—I didn’t kill it myself。 I put it down there and 

covered      it   up;  and  when     I  came   back   it   was    gone   。  。  。  It  was 



George Eliot                                                           ElecBook Classics 


… Page 594…

                                    Adam Bede                                       594 



because I was so very miserable; Dinah 。 。 。 I didn’t know where to 

go 。 。 。 and I tried to kill myself before; and I couldn’t。 Oh; I tried so 

to drown myself in the pool; and I couldn’t。 I went to Windsor—I 

ran   away—did   you   know?   I   went   to   find   him;   as   he   might   take 

care of me; and he was gone; and then I didn’t know what to do。 I 

daredn’t  go  back   home   again—I   couldn’t  bear  it。   I   couldn’t   have 

bore to look at anybody; for they’d have scorned me。 I thought o’ 

you   sometimes;   and   thought   I’d   come   to   you;   for   I   didn’t   think 

you’d be   cross  with  me;   and  cry  shame  on me。   I   thought  I   could 

tell you。 But then the other folks ’ud come to know it at last; and I 

couldn’t   bear   that。   It   was   partly   thinking   o’   you   made   me   come 

toward      Stoniton;     and;    besides;    I  was    so   frightened     at   going 

wandering about till I was a beggar…woman; and had nothing; and 

sometimes it seemed as if I must go back to the farm sooner than 

that。   Oh;   it   was   so   dreadful;   Dinah   。   。   。   I   was   so   miserable   。   。   。   I 

wished I’d never been born into this world。 I should never like to 

go into the green fields again—I hated ’em so in my misery。” 

    Hetty paused again; as if the sense of the past were too strong 

upon her for words。 

    “And then I got to Stoniton; and I began to feel frightened that 

night;   because   I  was   so near  home。   And  then   the   little baby  was 

born; when I didn’t expect it; and the thought came into my mind 

that I might get rid of it and go home again。 The thought came all 

of   a   sudden;   as   I   was   lying   in   the   bed;   and   it   got   stronger   and 

stronger 。 。 。 I longed so to go back again 。 。 。 I couldn’t bear being 

so lonely and coming to beg for want。 And it gave me strength and 

resolution to get up and dress myself。 I felt I must do it 。 。 。 I didn’t 

know how 。 。 。 I thought I’d find a pool; if I could; like that other; in 

the corner of the field; in the dark。 And when the woman went out; 



George Eliot                                       
返回目录 上一页 下一页 回到顶部 1 2
快捷操作: 按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页 按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页 按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部!
温馨提示: 温看小说的同时发表评论,说出自己的看法和其它小伙伴们分享也不错哦!发表书评还可以获得积分和经验奖励,认真写原创书评 被采纳为精评可以获得大量金币、积分和经验奖励哦!