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cranford(克兰弗德)-第15部分

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     〃But she wears widows' caps; ma'am?〃 



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                                            Cranford 



     〃Oh!      I   only   meant   something   in   that style;   not   widows';   of   course; 

but rather like Mrs Jamieson's。〃 

     This     effort   at  concealment       was     the  beginning      of   the   tremulous 

motion of head and hands which I have seen ever since in Miss                       Matty。 

     The   evening of   the day  on   which   we heard   of   Mr   Holbrook's   death; 

Miss   Matilda   was   very   silent   and   thoughtful;   after   prayers   she        called 

Martha back and then she stood uncertain what to say。 

     〃Martha!〃   she said;  at   last;  〃you   are   young〃   …   and   then   she   made   so 

long   a   pause   that   Martha;   to   remind   her   of   her   half…finished    sentence; 

dropped a curtsey; and said … 

     〃Yes;    please;    ma'am;     two…and…twenty   last       third  of   October;    please; 

ma'am。〃 

     〃And; perhaps; Martha;  you may some   time   meet with   a young   man 

you     like; and who likes you。          I did say you were not to have followers; 

but   if   you   meet   with   such   a   young   man;   and   tell   me;   and   I   find   he is 

respectable; I have no objection to his coming to see you once a                        week。 

God   forbid!〃   said   she   in   a   low   voice;   〃that   I   should   grieve any   young 

hearts。〃      She     spoke     as   if  she    were    providing      for   some      distant 

contingency; and was rather startled when Martha made her                        ready eager 

answer … 

     〃Please;   ma'am;   there's   Jem   Hearn;   and   he's   a   joiner   making   three… 

and…sixpence a…day; and six foot one in his stocking…feet; please;                     ma'am; 

and if you'll ask about him to…morrow morning; every one                       will give him 

a character for steadiness; and he'll be glad enough                   to come to…morrow 

night; I'll be bound。〃 

     Though Miss Matty was startled; she submitted to Fate and Love。 



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                                          Cranford 



          CHAPTER V … OLD LETTERS 



     I   HAVE   often   noticed   that   almost   every   one   has   his   own   individual 

small economies …         careful habits of saving fractions of pennies in            some 

one peculiar direction … any disturbance of which annoys him                    more than 

spending      shillings    or  pounds     on   some    real   extravagance。        An     old 

gentleman of my acquaintance; who took the intelligence of                      the failure 

of a Joint…Stock Bank; in which some of his money was                      invested; with 

stoical   mildness;   worried   his   family   all   through   a    long   summer's   day 

because one of them had torn (instead of cutting)                 out the written leaves 

of his now useless bank…book; of course; the               corresponding pages at the 

other   end   came   out   as   well;   and   this little   unnecessary   waste   of   paper 

(his private economy) chafed him              more than all the loss of his money。 

Envelopes fretted his soul          terribly when they first came in; the only way 

in   which    he   could    reconcile     himself    to  such   waste    of  his  cherished 

article was by       patiently turning inside out all that were sent to him; and 

so    making   them   serve   again。      Even   now;   though   tamed   by   age;   I   see 

him     casting   wistful   glances   at   his   daughters   when   they   send   a   whole 

inside of a half…sheet of note paper; with the three lines of               acceptance to 

an invitation; written on only one of the sides。             I    am not above owning 

that   I   have   this   human   weakness   myself。       String    is   my   foible。    My 

pockets   get   full   of   little   hanks   of   it;   picked   up and   twisted   together; 

ready for uses that never come。           I am     seriously annoyed if any one cuts 

the string of a parcel instead of        patiently and faithfully undoing it fold by 

fold。    How      people    can    bring    themselves      to  use   india…rubber     rings; 

which are a sort of        deification of string; as lightly as they do; I cannot 

imagine。      To     me   an   india…rubber   ring   is   a   precious   treasure。   I   have 

one which       is not new … one that I picked up off the floor nearly six years 

ago。    I have really tried to use it; but my heart failed me; and I                  could 

not commit the extravagance。 

     Small     pieces    of   butter    grieve    others。     They     cannot     attend    to 

conversation   because   of   the   annoyance   occasioned   by   the   habit   which 

some     people     have   of   invariably    taking    more    butter   than   they   want。 



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Have     you    not  seen    the  anxious     look   (almost    mesmeric)      which    such 

persons fix on the article?        They would feel it a relief if they         might bury 

it out of their sight by popping it into their own             mouths and swallowing 

it down; and they are really made happy if               the person on whose plate it 

lies unused suddenly breaks off a            piece of toast (which he does not want 

at all) and eats up his      butter。    They think that this is not waste。 

     Now     Miss    Matty    Jenkyns     was    chary   of  candles。     We     had   many 

devices     to use as few as possible。          In the winter afternoons she would 

sit   knitting for two or three hours … she could do this in the dark; or                 by 

firelight   …   and   when   I   asked   if   I   might   not   ring   for   candles   to finish 

stitching    my   wristbands;      she  told   me   to  〃keep    blind   man's    holiday。〃 

They were usually brought in with tea; but we only burnt                    one at a time。 

As we lived in constant preparation for a friend               who might come in any 

evening (but   who never did);  it required   some             contrivance to   keep our 

two candles of the same length; ready to be               lighted; and to look as if we 

burnt two always。        The candles took        it in turns; and; whatever we might 

be talking about or doing; Miss            Matty's eyes were habitually fixed upon 

the   candle;   ready   to   jump    up   and   extinguish   it   and   to   light   the   other 

before they had become           too uneven in length to be restored to equality in 

the course of      the evening。 

     One night; I remember this candle economy particularly annoyed me。 

I   had   been   very   much   tired   of   my   compulsory   〃blind   man's   holiday;〃 

especially as Miss Matty had fallen asleep; and I did not like to                   stir the 

fire and run the risk of awakening her; so I could not               even sit on the rug; 

and    scorch    myself    with   sewing     by   firelight;   according      to  my   usual 

custom。      I fancied Miss Matty  must be            dreaming of her early life; for 

she   spoke   one   or   two   words   in   her  uneasy   sleep   bearing   reference   to 

persons     who    were    dead   long    before。     When      Martha     brought    in  the 

lighted    candle    and   tea;  Miss    Matty     started   into   wakefulness;     with    a 

strange;     bewildered     look    around;     as  if  we   were    not  the   people    she 

expected      to  see   about   her。     There     was    a  little  sad  expression     that 

shadowed   her   face   as   she     recognised   me;   but   immediately   afterwards 

she tried to give me her         usual smile。       All through tea…time her talk ran 

upon the days of         her childhood and youth。           Perhaps this reminded her 



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of    the   desirableness       of  looking     over   all  the   old   family    letters;  and 

destroying   such   as   ought   not   to   be   allowed   to   fall   into   the   hands    of 

strangers; for she had often spoken of the necessity of this                   task; but had 

always   shrunk   from   it;   with   a   timid   dread   of   something   painful。         To… 

night; however; she rose up after tea and               went for them … in the dark; for 

she     piqued     herself    on    the   precise      neatness      of   all   her   chamber 

arrangements;   and   used   to   look   uneasily         at   me   when   I   lighted   a  
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